Expatria - the Unique State of Living Abroad

Life as a foreigner

The staff at Guisppe's Italian Restaurant on one of my returns to Tacloban

Living in a foreign land for an extended period of time is a lens like no other.

For instance, I don't think I could have ever ceased being a foreigner in the Philippines, but, that's okay for many reasons. Among those would be the fact that many in this archipelago have treated me so well, that I seem to often feel quite special here. Am I a novelty, or am I really that interesting and people back home just don't seem to understand? I guess the former, but I am holding out in hope of the latter. In either case, it's nice to be in a place where, maybe not everybody knows my name, but people look at me and smile. It's a simple thing, really. A smile goes a very long way, and showing people they are appreciated can get them to do almost anything for you.

Anytime you change your scenery - whether a place, an activity, or a group of friends - it affords you the opportunity to think, to adapt, and to evolve. As an expatriate, you are forced to make any number of life observations and come up with ideas, not just for how the world works, but for how it can work... and unfortunately sometimes how it doesn't. You see, of course, how people live - what they eat, how they react to things, what their passions are, what their problems are. You inevitably measure that culture against your own, and sometimes you are exhilarated, however also sometimes saddened.

Because of this lens of expatria, I do believe that while you can feel ever so welcome, and even sometimes like you are part of the family or neighborhood, there are constant reminders that you are still and will always be a visitor. This is not melancholy; it's simply a truth that you learn to see only after breaking through the barriers of being a stranger - that while each place in the world you love can offer you that temptation of the mind that it could be home, the humility that every world traveler must have tells you that what these people have is something sacred, and it is not for you to have simply because you want it, passing through with your backpack.

However, this realization is something quite valuable and unique. Not everyone gets the opportunity even to leave their own island in a lifetime. If expatria affords me the blessing of true friendship that knows no borders and forever enlightens what I know this world to be, if I can be welcomed back even where I feel I may not belong, these bonds in themselves are what I believe may just hold this fragile world together just a little bit longer.

Happy Forth - Thoughts of America from Abroad

One thing that intrigues me while I travel is how my country is perceived by people from around the world. To guess, based solely on what I hear people say at home or on the internet, I'd say everyone hates us. Never mind that lots and lots of people still visit or go through arduous processes to get to and live in America. Conventional wisdom seems to be that we are a violent, selfish, racist, arrogant, bully nation that is in need of some sort of enlightenment to regain the form of our youth.

Now, while I don't go around announcing my nationality or asking people on the street what they think of the United States, I do tend to meet people who ask me where I'm from, and sometimes we have a conversation. Pleasantly surprising, most meet my answer with a smile, and many times with some personal anecdote of their fondness for my country. Perhaps some are just being polite, but I get the feeling that many genuinely have a positive outlook on - even if not the government, then at least - our people. Even as recently as today, I still see people wearing American themed clothing - shirts, hats, and such. Yankees hats and Lakers jerseys are quite common on several continents, but even sporting gear aside, America still seems to be in fashion.

I can't tell you how distressing it is to have read the news for over a year now traveling, and there has just been divisive and upsetting story after story. Add in this nightmare of an election we are having, and many days, I just don't want to go back. People have asked me about guns, terrorism, sports, Indian tribes, the different states... but mostly Trump. Surprisingly, in Ireland, some folks weren't nearly as put off by him as many, however most seem to be of the opinion that he is either a joke or worse - a threat to world civilization.

However, what you see traveling the world is that every country has its conflicts and problems. Just this trip, I have seen: Nepal gain a new constitution that many would argue does not enough to address the inequality of women and minorities, the Philippines elect a new president who seems to have little regard for due process and a disdain for the media, and Great Britain decide to leave Europe. Since I began my trip, there has been an average of about 3 incidents of terrorism per day (7/day last month) throughout dozens of countries. Other plagues, such as poverty and various other injustices persist and would be too numerous to list.

I think people see us as a flawed giant, but recognize that we cannot be blamed for everything. Many see the work we do in delivering aid to those in need, working for peace and security where we think we can have an impact, and risking our lives to confront those who perpetrate evil and destruction. In seeing some of the pollution different parts of this world contribute and endure, it is difficult to imagine those people wagging their fingers at us any time soon. In short, as an American who has stepped out of his world to live within and among many other communities, we might just be being a little hard on ourselves.

Despite our many flaws, we have made it to our 240th birthday, and we are still here; people still look to us for influence. That certainly could change, but I think it is important to consider one thing - we are still capable of having an impact on the world and on our futures. In the 1960s, before we walked on the moon, the conditions were already set in motion that there was an African-American child who could aspire to and eventually win the Presidency of the United States of America. I like to think of this not to pretend some end of racism, but to consider what future is already possible for someone today when prospects seem incontrovertibly dim in the now. In the words of my dad, "look ahead!" Who knows what power we may have today to affect the reality of the future? I think that is still one of our greatest strengths, and others around the world can see it too.

Enjoy your burgers and fireworks. I'll probably have a pizza.

Ten Reasons Why You Should Never Travel the World for a Year

*UPDATE: See Part 2 of this list here: Walking Amadeus: Ten Reasons Why You Should Never Travel the World for a Year (Part 2)

Sure, it seems glamorous, exciting, challenging... an opportunity of a lifetime, yadda, yadda. Travel around the world for long periods of time is hard, and you should consider these reasons to just stay home:

10. All Toilets Are Not Created Equal
Sure, they serve the same purpose in every country, but you like having toilet paper, do ya? You like knowing you can sit down if you need to, do ya? Not every culture does. You just might find yourself hovering (hope you have good knees and good aim) and in a bit of a pickle that could ruin a good portion of your day. The good news is that you may just find yourself inclined to the habit of A) economically utilizing the tissue you've learned to bring with you, and B) finding cool new ways to form disposable balls of used said tissues for the bin on the floor... even if there isn't one.

9. You Will Probably Get Sick
It could be a mysterious rash, some sort of gift from a random insect, or Delhi Belly, but unless you are rich enough to stay in nice hotels and eat at great restaurants all the time, you are vulnerable to all sorts of things that might put a damper on your travel plans (or life). The good news is they oftentimes have medicines for those things, even in developing nations... and sometimes toilets to sit on.

8. You Will Miss Lots of Birthdays
... And graduations, and holidays. It's no fun for an American to spend Fourth of July in a place where nobody cares, and some places you just can't source turkey or cranberries for Thanksgiving. You will probably miss your favorite sports, because people in other countries don't watch it, and if they did, it might be on at some strange hour when you should be sleeping. What you will get to do is turn on the Facebook and see lots of pictures of your friends and family celebrating and having fun without you.

7. You Will Be Ruined for Proper Croissants and Great Ceviche
Yes, for the rest of your life you will resent all failed attempts at replicating the best foods of the world. That juice in a can will never be as good as fresh buko juice that your friend's grandfather climbed the tree to get for you. The list can go on and on, but I think you get the point.

6. You Will Lose Things
I prefer the term "liberate," because it sounds like I'm doing something good for the world. Sometimes it's the little things like a phone charger at the hostel or one of your favorite socks at the laundry service. Other times it could be your purse or your cell phone that walked away when you weren't looking. The good news is you just enriched the local economy, and that is admirable, my friend.

5. Home Will Annoy You
Now, not everything, of course; you will always love your In-N-Out Double Double, your dog, and your mother (not necessarily in that order). However, the more you learn about the world by being out in it, the more some things will seem petty when you return. See those little kids over there happily playing with marbles or playing some sort of dodgeball with their sandals? Yeah, it makes mandatory gift bags after soccer matches and other eccentricities seem horribly unnecessary when people on the other side of the world live very full lives with much less.

4. You Can't Take It With You
So you would love to collect great bottles of wine to take home with you? No. Maybe you found some great antique bookends in Morocco. No. Artwork? The answer is no. In most cases, what you want may be too heavy, delicate, perishable, or bulky to add to your already overloaded backpack. No.

3. You Won't Be Comfortable
What's that? You don't like the feeling of a stranger's elbow, thigh, two small children, or chicken touching you for three hours on a bus built for 2/3 the capacity it is carrying? You like the feeling of not being lost every other day? You know that couch with pillows or that glass full with ice? Get over it.

2. People Will Rip You Off
See #6. Yes, there is no better deed that gifting your weekly travel budget to a community in need, but sometimes you want to hold on to as much money as you can. There are bad people everywhere who target travelers, and unless you are always on your A-game, you are the target. Cheating tourists is a $2 billion a year business (I made that number up). Taxi drivers, street vendors... sometimes policemen or even your own hotel are all in on it. I got stuck paying $200 extra to enter a country, and my own airline had me detained overnight in an airport. You will learn to trust no one.

1. The People You Will Have to Leave
You will meet some of the best people in your travels. In some cases, you might think, "What if this person lived in my same city?" You will have random discussions with strangers that will enlighten you. You may share moments with someone who could be your best friend. Most of these people you will never see again. You will say a lot of goodbyes... if you're lucky. The people you leave may be the hardest part.

Now... given all these warnings, if you still want to go out and see the world - actually live out in the world - I've done my part to admonish you. I can't be held responsible. And good for you.

Episode One - Departures

Mothers Day - Philippines

I was fortunate to meet some great mothers in the Philippines, and every face tells a story. Happy Mothers Day to you all, and thanks for showing all those kids how to smile.

What We Miss - Inside the Mind of a Long-Term World Traveler

Tacloban Seaside

When traveling far from home for extended periods of time, it's normal for even the most seasoned traveler to have things that he misses. Usually, we find substitutes to fill the void, but ideally the new experiences are so fulfilling that there just isn't time to miss much. In my current position, I have been able to interview many travelers from different countries. In addition to the queries regarding what makes them tick, I usually add on the question, "What do you miss about home?"

I can remember on past trips, we would all sit around and share those answers, maybe directly related to some deficit in our then current situation, but usually they were all very specific things, all something we all could relate to, and all put a smile on each of our faces to imagine. Digging a well in 100 degree heat in Malawi, we tried to be content with the little things, but someone had to mention something as usually commonplace as "ice." We all stopped to think about the miracle of ice for a moment. Then we dared to go a step further and imagine "pina colada!" Now of course that was directly related to an extreme circumstance, but a lot about travel is relatively extreme in one way or another.

Now, the people I have been interviewing actually surprise me. Besides the standard "my parents," "my dog," and "my bed" answers, most of my interviewees have very little comment on the subject - many with kind of a blank look in their eyes. All of these people are volunteers with an NGO, and most are in their early twenties, so I'm guessing they are just so excited to be out and free or there are many whom I can tell are long-term travelers precisely because they don't want to be at home, and some even show disdain. Furthermore, with a near free-flow of internet connectivity these days, your internet reality travels with you wherever you go, so there is less reality reality to miss!

I don't know, but everywhere I am, I miss some other place. From past experiences, I know others feel the same way. Usually it's a food item; sometimes it's a steak, good beer, In 'N Out Burger, Prosciutto di Parma - something very specific. Other times it is an event - 4th of July and Thanksgiving are tough times for Americans to be abroad. I'm not even a huge sports fanatic, but I still get goosebumps seeing an NFL game on in Prague or an NBA playoff game in the Philippines. In talking recently with a fellow American, who has been gone longer than I have, we both agreed we missed the certain chill in the air that autumn (usually) brings or something as simple as a sofa and a warm blanket. Of course we miss our families, and though we may not be in contact much, we really enjoy seeing photos of Tae Kwon Do practice or silly videos that would otherwise soon be deleted. At the beach, we might miss the snow, and in a remote landlocked location we probably miss the ocean.

Perhaps it's a function of where we have been and lived - what attachments we have made, what we have tasted, what we have seen, and whom we have known. Does the person who has traveled to one hundred countries miss more than the one who has never left the island of her birth? Is that why as soon as we get home we start planning our next trip? Or is it just that we are not content? Perhaps the world is so captivating, that we seek out new places, people, and experiences despite what we miss, because we know the deprivation will be worth it.

If we would miss something enough, does that mean we would never leave? Not sure, but I'll let you know if I ever find out.

Walking Amadeus Series Premiere Trailer - Nov 1, 2015 release